Ch 18: Getting Help

Actually, You’re NOT Stupid

Having finished the painstaking process of writing my own book, I dared to finally open that of a famous financial writer. The first words I saw? “You’re stupid…” Oh! Even though this book wasn’t written to me, I automatically believed it, just as though it had been. And even though my finances are ticketyboo, and surpass anyone’s expectations, I felt my cheeks flush with shame.

I opened to another random page, “…you don’t deserve a raise.” Ouch! Again with the auto-shame, even though I deserve all good things.

A friend had told me my book was important to her because mine did not shame her. I now understood what she meant. Not having looked at the “financial shaming genre” before, I had no idea what was out there, no awareness of the messages that people in difficult circumstances were being subjected to when they set out to right their financial ship.

Those books are wrong.
You are not stupid.
Even though you did not know the money stuff early, you do deserve good things.

Financial success has nothing to do with intelligence. Plenty of extremely smart or educated people have their finances in the toilet. We were not taught the essentials, so how could we have known? And once we landed in financial straits, people kicked us in the shins with messages such as that author’s.

You are not stupid.
I was not stupid.
We do deserve good things: security, a peaceful home, nutrition, fun.

If you made financial errors in the past, you are not stupid, and you need not punish yourself with ongoing destitution.
You can right your financial ship, and quite quickly.
In my book, I show you how to do so even if you face a disability, abuse, or other painful circumstances that could easily take you down.

If you’re ready to experience the ease and peace that comes with financial well-being, kindness and support are available to you.

2 thoughts on “Actually, You’re NOT Stupid

  1. Dearest Joon,

    I cried while reading this because I have felt so stupid about money for so long, and when I read your book I finally felt like it wouldn’t even matter if I AM stupid, I might still be able to change how I am doing things.

    My whole family is smart with money, but somehow I missed whatever it is that they got that set them up to know what to do with money, and how to be careful with it.

    And they are good people, but they don’t exactly have a lot of understanding for my situation. I have tried! I have read lots of money books, and tried to make the changes they talk about, but then I just end up feeling worse when it doesn’t work.

    Your book just made me feel like someone was talking to me who actually knows what it is like to NOT BE GOOD WITH MONEY. So, you weren’t always good with money, I mean that part that you talk about having to learn ways you were giving too much of it away and stuff, and look at you now!

    I think that I’m going to actually be able to do this stuff now. I have been doing what you said in your book about tracking things, even if not perfectly. I have been asking for receipts for stuff, even though I feel really embarassed when I do that. I don’t know why, i just do. But I figure, that is okay, I need to just feel embarassed and ask for it anyway.

    Thank you for telling me I am not stupid. Because money is the only area I feel stupid in. And now you are saying, hey – even that is not necessarily true, just because other people are saying it.

    Thank you.


    1. Dear Willow,

      Your comment filled my whole heart.

      I’m so glad you feel able to do this now! I really love that you’re requesting receipts now even though this is new, uncomfortable, and embarrassing for you. You’re working away through the emotions that block us from financial self-care. You’ve got this!

      Yes, I was so bad with money —there are a million possible ways to be such, and I sure met the criteria, lol!

      Thank you so much for taking the time to write that beautiful letter to me 🙂



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